i think every generation believes that they, and only they, have the market cornered on fun. there's no way anyone older than them can possibly be fun....even if they were "in their day", now they are just OLD. i mean, right? my kids think i'm old and no fun - and CLEARLY they are mistaken.....so why should i be any different. now in my defense, i totally recognize that my parents definitely had fun.....they have life long friends who have over the years been cohorts for all kinds of stuff, ranging from bowling to mah jong to poker. but i also forgot how much absolute FUN my parents have always had with music. i love to dance. my kids love to dance. and big shocker - so does my MOTHER!! and she ROCKS. now i knew this. i've grown up watching her and my aunt jean hand dance their way through every occasion where we could find a reason to play music. but it occurred to me tonight for the first time in a long time, just how super fun my parents can be. and got a small glimpse into one of the things that has probably helped keep them together all this time.
i should go back and say, my best memories of being at my house center around what we call "the big room". silly name for a room that we were never allowed to go in, except when we had company - but it was over the garage and hence, the biggest room in our house. in the "big room" stands a cabinet - which is definitely older than me - and contains a reel-to-reel music player and a real live RECORD player...with 4 speeds and everything....that sucker will play anything and everything that was made prior to tapes.....it was in the big room that we celebrated holidays and had our family functions. but more importantly, it was the room with the MUSIC. it was where my mom attempted to teach us all how to hand dance and do the hustle, and where invariably all the kids would end up sitting down to watch how cool all the grown ups were.
Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it. George Orwell
there are many many things i've learned from my parents. and i one of the things i have ALWAYS known is how lucky i am to have had 2 parents who not only stayed together, but put us first. they both did a lot of things i'm sure they didnt want to so that my sisters and i had everything we needed. and when i look back, for the most part i think about what they TAUGHT me....sitting at dinner every night discussing the world and politics and ethics. it was usually pretty heavy stuff, but they made us all think for ourselves. they challenged us to be our best, and helped up get wherever we wanted to go. they were and are amazing parents. but with that being said, i'm glad i got the reminder about the "other" stuff too.
i got my love of sports from my dad, but its my mom who is the serious competitor. i got my love of music from my dad, but its my mom who is the dancer. just a great combination that i'm not sure i appreciated before. and i absolutely LOVE seeing them together, with their friends, having fun. not only does it make me happy as a daughter, but it gives me hope for the future. maybe our definition of "fun" changes as we get older....maybe it doesnt....but life is as much fun as you make it, whatever your age. now i dont consider going to ihop fun, but i bet my 89 year old grandparents think it is. and they do it EVERY SINGLE DAY. i wonder if my parents look at THEM and think, wow- i hope in 20 years we are still going to breakfast every day. maybe the "fun" gets simpler over time. maybe we dont expect as much. or maybe its always the same. i'm just glad to know its always out there.
i guess i'm just getting sentimental, but as i sat there watching my parents dance last night, it literally brought tears to my eyes. i've always known that they were a great example of PARENTING. i just don't think i've given them enough credit in the COUPLE department. they been together for 55 years (yes, you read that right) and been married for 47. clearly they are doing something right. in my mind i think i always just thought they were both too stubborn to quit. which i admire, don't get me wrong. and i know they appreciate each other and the roles they play. but it took seeing them together OUT, away from all the day to day stress, to make me SEE them as a couple. and it was just amazing to see how SOLID and TOGETHER they are. and yes, they are absolutely FUN. so go mom and dad!!
just like i will never be able to hear "still of the night" and not think of my dad, i will never be able to watch anyone hand dance and not think of mom and aunt jean. i'm not sure if that's odd or not :) but i love both of those memories. i didnt realize how dear a place in my heart they held until last night. i hope when my kids are my age, they are able to look back and appreciate what they had growing up, but also to look at us and think "wow, they still got it"! i feel like i'm always saying appreciate each day with your kids -which you know you should. but i'll add to that today - hug your parents if they are still with you. dont take them for granted. foibles and all, they are the foundation of everything you have and are today. and if you are smart or serious or crazy or fun - no matter in what combination, you know you can trace it to somehow somewhere to your parents. maybe you have to look a little deeper for the crazy or the fun, but i bet you its in there :)
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